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Post by Amber Malinda on Jun 11, 2010 23:11:51 GMT -6
amber malinda was never the most popular girl, nor was she the kind of person that kept to herself all the time. she despised the whole idea of the rich and beautiful ruling the school; that the ones that people were most intimidated by were the ones that were in charge, but then again, that made sense. no one would challenge your power if they were scared, but still, was it really necessary to have a queen bee of the school? it just made valkyrie academy more fake than necessary, but maybe the academy wouldn't be what it was if people were actually real. amber couldn't really complain though. this was a big step up compared to her school in new york. there were still some similarities, like how the people were fake but their clothes and accessories just had to be legit (you know how those fashionistas and shopaholics can spot a knock off from miles away). still, in valkyrie, she actually had a life. she wasn't stuck in the house doing chores and work like an unpaid maid. that wasn't even allowed, huh? however, instead of trying to turn her situation into some legal issue, amber had runaway. it had all gone so well until seth had found her, and then her life went downhill again. what a wonderful brother.
so maybe amber wasn't a house slave anymore, but now that seth had found her in valkyrie, how long would it be before she became one again? she didn't want to go back to live with her aunt in new york where seth would be treated like a prince while she was some peasant. she had lived in manhattan, new york for most of her life, yet amber had experienced so little of her hometown. do i really have to point out what's wrong with that? she never got into the whole fashion aspect of new york, nor was she partying it up at country clubs and all that jazz, but maybe that was a blessing in disguise. that was most likely the reason why she had stayed so grounded and didn't turn into a zombie that just followed what everyone else did and jumped on bandwagons, because we all know that if new york had tainted amber, she would have told her aunt to get the fuck off her back and if she ever ended up going to valkyrie, she'd fit in. the last thing amber wanted to do was fit in with these lame wannabes of valkyrie, because she had only met a few people who didn't make her want to laugh in their face. in addition, if amber had fit in, she would definitely not be at the park on a saturday.
no, if that were the case, amber would probably be prepping for some party that she was going to go to that night, or trying to make herself look older to sneak into a club. just the thought of it made her want to scoff; amber did not have the face to sneak into a club. considering how she only had a few friends that she loved and weren't annoyed by, amber wasn't the kind of girl that had to 'pencil' people into her 'agenda', and when her friends were busy, she was usually just out by herself, just doing whatever she felt like doing. today, she was in a peaceful mood, which was unlike her loud self, and the park was the perfect place to wander around. usually, the park would bore her without her friends by her side, yet something must have gotten into her, because she was more than willing to take a walk through the valkyrie park and take a look at the trees and flowers that she was already familiar with. maybe it was the stress of trying to get her grades up after getting a lecture from a teacher. usually, she wouldn't have given a damn, but the woman wouldn't stop talking. it was torture, and so amber had blurted out, "OKAY. I'LL STUDY." despite being rebellious and causing trouble often, amber couldn't help but feel the urge to keep her word.
but hey, she wasn't feeling like herself this week, remember.
deep down inside though, amber was well aware of what made her feel like doing something good with her life this week. it was alex suresh, her best friend who became an ex-best friend slash enemy, and then was her best friend again. having alex back in her life made her temporary and unnecessary bitchiness go away, and after her confession, amber had realized had great her life really was. she may have had parents that really didn't care and an evil aunt, but she didn't have an abusive, alcoholic father that kidnapped her, and then come back to a terrible friend. just knowing that amber had been said terrible friend made her feel horrible, and that must have been the spark that made her want to work harder for the week. however, this whole phase would probably pass soon, and she'd be back to her pranking and mischievous ways. yup, that amber malinda would be back soon and she probably wasn't going to visit the park alone again anytime soon when she had free time. nah, she'd probably be playing some rock band, vlogging, playing the drums, or skateboarding. the fact that she had passed all of those options up to come to the park should have been on scandal star or something; it didn't happen often.
not that she noticed all of the other things she could have been doing, of course, or she would have ran home that instant. for now, however, she'd just be smiling at the beauty that was the valkyrie park in california, and how it still looked alive despite it being summer. when she got bored or lonely, she'd be home, but for now, she was perfectly content as she walked over to a bench, sat down, and observed her surroundings. a peaceful amber malinda; who would have ever thought it was possible?
- - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - NOTES • --- WORD COUNT • 1010 . LET'S FLAUNT IT • click . TAGGED • graham / ruby . SETTING • saturday around two at the valkyrie park . CREDITS • lyrics to 2ne1; format & banner by me.
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Post by Graham McCarthy on Jun 12, 2010 6:45:43 GMT -6
VALKYRIE PARK, AFTERNOON, NOVEMBER 2007 [/font][/center] -----oh what he wouldn't have given to be normal. to everyone else it seemed like something they had too much of. there was too much of a routine to their lives, too much normalcy and not enough spark, but for graham mccarthy the same could not be said. graham wanted that normal, boring, hum-drum life. he wanted to veg out on a couch for hours simply because there was nothing better to do. he wanted to have a list of chores that would make him grumble a complaint but one look from his mother would have him up and mowing the lawn. he wanted to have a room decorated with memorabilia from over the years, picture frames on any flat surface of hanging out with friends and old girlfriends, yearbooks in a dusty heap on the floor, disjointed color schemes from an attempt to "mature" the look of his room. there were so many "normal" things in life that people took for granted but no one seemed to realize how special it was. graham would have killed for a life that most people called a snore. he would have killed to grow up ignorant of the life he was so unfortunate to know and he would have absolutely loved to have been unhappy with his life and strived for something greater than what he had. that kind of innocence growing up was impossible for him now that he'd lived the life he had. it was worse than growing up in the projects with guns pointed at your head around every turn. it was worse than living in the ghetto where your best friends were gunned down every other week, making it feel like something normal. true that the projects gave a person a sense of survival. it tended to make people bitter because they saw the shit they had and the life that they wanted, but it was a roof over their head. true they may not know when the next meal was, but that was never a certainty.
-----growing up on the streets was like a worse version of the ghetto, if there ever was such a case. you didn't get to step out your front door and see over the horizon the landscape of beautiful houses that you begged to be a part of. no instead you woke up every morning in regret and fear. most mornings someone else would wake you up, a construction worker, a passerby, or a police officer would tell you to get your things and get lost. you didn't get to see what you had and what others had and be jealous because you had nothing to your name to begin with. everything around you looked like heaven to be a part of. even something as terrible as the ghetto looked like salvation. sure the location sucked, the people were terrible, and it was dangerous, but it was a roof over your head, a place to stay dry, and a place to store something you might have seen as valuable. the ghetto was crap, graham would admit that. it was scary and it was dirty and it was loud with the pained cries of people in the slums who just wanted more, but it was still nothing compared to sleeping on the bare ground, alone. graham had never made it to any place like new york, but if he had, he would have without a doubt been disgusted with the people there. from what he'd seen and been told it was like no one was happy with what they had there. it you didn't have the right kind of bag you were shunned. if you didn't wear the right style shoes then you were practically begging to be stoned in times square. not that he prayed for it, but graham sometimes wondered what those hoity toity people would be like if something had happened that killed all the power in the world and rendered everyone on the same page. would they walk around with their ugg boots and prada whatever during the apocalypse? would they layer on their gucci while they shuddered with cold on a park bench? ridiculous.
-----sure he didn't have much, in fact he had more than he ever used to since the mccarthys had adopted him, but he tried not to take advantage of it. he couldn't give much away because in all truth it wasn't his to give, but he'd talked raquelle into giving money to his cause, donating clothes and whatnot every chance they got. he wasn't trying to take from them anything they didn't already want to give, but he was helping them to try and make better choices in what they did with the things they didn't want anymore. maybe, somehow, it would make a difference.
-----he didn't know why is was always somewhere outdoors that he went to whenever raquelle asked him to get off his butt and be social. she would probably hope that after enough times he'd hit the mall or something and come back with a girlfriend. it had after all been about a year that he'd been with the mccarthys and so far he still hadn't done much socializing. but he liked the park. there was just enough noise to not be loud and there were just enough people here to not be crowded. if there was a way to slowly get him used to people, this was probably the best way for him to go about it. he stayed away from the pier. after his first encounter with scarlett, well he'd been afraid something else like that would happen, someone would spot him and try to pry into his life like they had nothing better to do. honestly he just couldn't sit around by himself and enjoy something? guess not. as he walked around the park, graham noticed that the bench he'd taken a liking too was now occupied. he grumbled under his breath but headed toward the bench anyways. it was in no way his, but it had the best view and shade to sunlight ratio and damn it he just liked that bench. he sat himself down beside a tiny brunette, stretching out his legs and just relaxing. sure he may have shown up unannounced and sure there were probably other unoccupied benches around, but it wasn't like he was sitting in her lap right?
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status • finished words • 1245 tagged • gramber ! clothes • click listening to • secrets - onerepublic. notes • hope it's alright. he doesn't say much xD.
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Post by Amber Malinda on Jun 12, 2010 22:18:42 GMT -6
although amber's views on life weren't completely changed, and her values for the most part were the same, she still had a new sense of appreciation for her life. you know, that feeling you get after watching a movie like freedom writers and how people on the streets struggled to get by. or when you heard on the news that people were kidnapped or murdered. how about those natural disasters? earthquakes, hurricanes, floods... the world would never be safe, but some people were more guarded and lucky than others. some grew up in a somewhat safe area and never had to go through all the difficulties that others in the world had to go through. there were even people who grew up in a somewhat safe area, but had family members that spoiled that originally positive environment. amber couldn't help but wonder how boys and girls older, younger, or even her age dealt with having an alcoholic mother or a druggie as a father. how did they raise themselves if their parents never really cared to begin with? what if they had no relatives to take care of themselves and were alone? there were so many questions that she had for those kids and teenagers. it just showed that whether you think you're capable of doing something or not, sometimes you find out when you have no other options. does anyone really want to live in a town that was hit by a hurricane? no, but when that hurricane hits, you don't really have any choice but to move on with your life. fix all that you can and continue on. whether they were big or little obstacles, you would have to overcome them, or else your life would most likely be on pause or get worse; at least, that's the way amber thought. if only she could meet people that were so strong and tough. ones that have gone through so much unnecessary trouble they didn't deserve. how would she do that? becoming a journalist, possibly?
as if she'd know the answer to that. amber wasn't sure what she wanted to do with her life, and she was started to get into a panic mode, since everyone around her seem to know what they wanted to do. oh, that girl over there obviously wanted to be a fashion designer, and that guy right there wanted to specialize in photography. let's not forget that surfer chick in gym that also loved cooking, and was pretty damn good at it. then there was the future doctor, marine biologist, ballerina, and director. hidden somewhere in the crowds of decided careers, there was amber malinda, wishing that she never grew up and had more time to think everything through. the times when people asked, "what do you what to mean when you grow up?", it didn't really matter what you said, because you had so many years to get to that spot. you had all the time in the world to decide what you wanted to be and all the other little details of your life. ugh, time went by too fast. amber was only fifteen, yet apart of her didn't want to get any older. she was fifteen years old with dreams of having some sort of talk show after enjoying her vlogs, but also wanting to become a musician and be the drummer in the next hottest band, her best friend on guitar of course, and her other best friend filming their music videos. those dreams seemed so out of reach though. almost impossible. there were so many other people wanting to be musicians and talk show hosts; something in the entertainment industries. there were so many people that were better than her at speaking, and played the drums like they had to do so to save their life. amber had a passion for playing her drums and loved talking, but that would probably never be enough for her to beat out everyone else.
who would have thought that just having her best friend back in her life would make her think so deeply about her life? then again, all the stress of figuring out what to do with her life and surviving school also contributed to amber's trip to the valkyrie park. not only did she have nothing to do this saturday morning, she needed the free time. she needed some peace to calm her worries and stop her from breaking down some random day at school. it had never happened before, but it was better to be safe than sorry. her mind and body knew exactly where amber would appreciate being, and she didn't even know it herself. the fact that she chose the park over all the other places she could have gone, such as starbucks, was amazing, since it was practically involuntary. it was so unplanned and when amber had left the door of her house, she still hadn't known where she was going to go, but the park had stuck out. like there was some magnetic force drawing her in, and amber was finally sure, as her eyes viewed the nature of valkyrie, that she had figured out why she had wanted to come her. with the recent realization that she had been a shitty friend and just school in general, she needed this. she needed to be at the park; it was a place that brought back childhood memories - not many, but still some -, and when she thought about her childhood, amber would temporarily have that carefree feeling that she had as a child. why couldn't life just have stayed that easy?
it wasn't like amber was a middle-aged woman, yet she was already complaining about how busy and stressful her life was. there had to be a problem there somewhere, but as previously mentioned, that was exactly what she was at the park. it was just perfect. it was so serene, but the kids laughing and running around added some noise so that it wasn't completely creepy. amber did not enjoy the dead silence; that may have been the reason why she needed to fall asleep with her ipod on shuffle, and also the reason why when she was an old lady, she wasn't going to hear very well due to listening to something every night of her life, even when she was asleep. her eyes were looking out into the world with no specific target, and a complete stranger would have thought that she was quite a peaceful person. ahah, as if. that state of mind was probably only going to last today - someone should really document it. she was so deep in thought, and this happened rarely since she hated having questions that no one knew the answer to. however, her thoughts were interrupted as she noticed a familiar stranger taking a seat on the bench near her. she felt like she saw him somewhere before, but amber felt that way about a lot of people she had never met before, so it wasn't really a big deal. amber couldn't help but wonder why he didn't sit at any other bench, but instead of questioning him, she gave a slight head nod along with a small smile. her way of saying, "hey." when her voice didn't really feel like talking. with that, her focus was back to the nature of the park and how she loved escaping from her worries, even if it wasn't going going to last.
- - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - NOTES • i have a feeling this might be one quiet thread, lol. WORD COUNT • 1246 . lol, one word more than you .xD LET'S FLAUNT IT • click . TAGGED • graham / ruby . SETTING • saturday around two at the valkyrie park . CREDITS • lyrics to 2ne1; format & banner by me.
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Post by Graham McCarthy on Jun 15, 2010 12:40:06 GMT -6
VALKYRIE PARK, AFTERNOON, NOVEMBER 2007 [/font][/center] -----graham knew a lot about picking up the pieces and just moving on with his life. for years that had been one of the only things graham knew how to do. one home after the other was nothing more than just another roller coaster ride that would he would forever be picking up the pieces of afterwards. it wasn't fun. when he was a kid, graham had hoped that he would have some sense of normalcy. he'd been exposed to a decent orphanage as a newborn and had lived under decent conditions till he was a toddler, graham was happy to think that any home was like the one he was leaving. how nice would it be to go from the orphanage to a foster home and get to have the opportunities that real kids got to have? he may have been young, but graham knew from an early age that his situation was anything but normal and he wanted nothing more than to live like everyone else. it wasn't like that was too much to ask. least to the four year old it didn't seem like much to ask, but apparently it was. graham's first foster home had been a nightmare. he'd been one of at least seven foster kids in that house, and they'd all been treated like crap. they ranged in ages from twelve to three, graham being somewhere in the middle, and they'd been forced to do any and all housework, chores, and anything else one could imagine. they never went to school, never got an education, and when they were punished the cruel methods the foster parents had come up with were enough to make even the hardest person weep. it was in his first foster home that graham had learned how to be quiet and keep his head down. he did anything he was told and was the least likely out of all seven kids to get punished on a daily basis. honestly it was one of the worst situations he'd ever been in, and he was stuck there for almost seven years.
-----by the time graham had gotten out of that foster home, grabbed by the state when people finally took notice to what the foster parents were doing and reported them, graham was shipped off to yet another home. some part of him had hoped that maybe, just maybe, graham would have gotten a decent home, but that never happened. it seemed like every foster home was worst than the next, something graham didn't even know to be possible. it got to the point where whenever he was picked up off the street and thrown in another home, it would only take about twenty three hours for him to find some way to escape, and then he was never heard from again. the foster parents knew he was a runner. they knew it was a waste of time to try keeping him around. so they wouldn't bother. they would keep getting the state checks until someone came to check up on graham and then they would report him missing. people within the state thought he would stick around in a home for months before the worker assigned to his case would show. they thought he had a thing for outrunning the state, not running from the homes. it couldn't be farther from the truth. he would live on the streets for as long as he could muster. he preferred sticking around a town with a homeless shelter where he could get food and find a warm place indoors when the weather wasn't so permitting. by looking at him, a person couldn't likely tell that the teenage boy was in fact really, really smart. they would see him walking down the street, or hanging out in the nearest park, wearing the rattiest clothes you could imagine. people just didn't think he was smart. but in fact, finding numerous new ways to get out of his foster homes took some serious brain power.
-----getting to valkyrie, and winding up here with a real home and real decent people, it all sounded like a fairytale for the homeless. he was the cinderella of foster kids. to an extent, graham still couldn't grasp it. he still didn't understand why the mccarthys cared so much about him. he knew why raquelle had taken a shining to him, she had been the only person that graham had ever fully confessed to. she'd wanted to give him a better life and whatnot, but the rest of them? graham didn't know what mr. mccarthy or effie had going for them as far as graham's situation went, but they were still standing by raquelle. he was sure that they hadn't expected her to come home one day saying that she wanted to adopt one of the foster home runaways who'd gotten sick in juvie and who had been held up in her hospital for weeks. hell graham still didn't understand it so how could they? he was sure they probably had a better understanding of raquelle. maybe they knew that she had a habit of taking in strays? maybe they knew that she liked to take care of people outside of the hospital. who knew. graham certainly didn't get it, but he wasn't about to start complaining now.
-----he knew he'd probably caught the girl on the bench off guard, because there were indeed a lot of other benches empty and available for his butt to sit upon, but there was something about this bench. it was the first one he'd sat on when he'd officially moved here. it was the place he and raquelle had their first talk about what life was going to be like and that fact that he was no longer a foster kid, but a member of the family. it sounded silly to be so attached to an inanimate object, but this bench stood for a lot. and it had one of the best views of the rest of the park. so he could have moved elsewhere, but he didn't want to. he saw her nod and noted the slight smile, and managed to drum up a half smile before he turned his attention out to the scenery. "it's just one of the best seats in the house." shocking. graham was the first to speak up. that was one for the books he was sure, because graham couldn't remember a time when he'd been the first to speak. he liked his peace and quiet far too much to interrupt it with insignificant little conversations.
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status • finished words • 1289 tagged • gramber ! clothes • click listening to • secrets - onerepublic. notes • lol, going to be a very quiet thread.
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Post by Amber Malinda on Jun 20, 2010 23:26:15 GMT -6
if you were going to ask amber malinda when was the last time she had taken the time to go somewhere as calm as the park and just relax and do nothing else but cherish nature, she wouldn't have an answer. if you had asked her that, just maybe last week, she maybe would have scoffed after thinking that she'd get too bored too easily. the park? really? what was she going to do? slide on the slide that was so short that while sitting on the top, her feet could probably touch the ground? or how about playing with that giant version of tic tac toe? running around and playing tag with no one except herself? yeah, that didn't sound like fun to her. the only thing she would have considered was spending some time on the swings, considering how she didn't need someone else there with her, and she had always loved swings, even as a little girl. apparently, that love never went away despite not going to the park in what felt like forever. she had always been to busy working or doing schoolwork, but ever since amber had moved to valkyrie, she had been slacking off. she really needed to get back into actually having responsibilities before she got so used to the luxury of having so much freedom and her life ended up going nowhere. she had gotten so caught up and being so careless that she had abandoned her priorities, only doing enough work to maintain a b, though she was completely satisfied with a c as her grade. it was a bit funny how she didn't want to work, but when amber had all the free time from not working, she got bored and didn't do anything productive. note to self: go find a job before you grow up and have nothing on your resume.
as soon as amber malinda realized that she was starting to think about work and responsibilities, she automatically forced herself to move that train of thought on another path. it seemed that no matter how much she tried to avoid thinking of something that would involve stress or a topic that would just make her plain tired, amber's mind seemed to wander so much while she was calm and relaxed that avoiding those subjects at hand was impossible. despite successfully thinking of something else (it was easy to think of something else when she was surrounded by such serenity and beauty that the park had contained), it wouldn't be long before amber would think of something, start to feel like she needed some relaxation, and then have to distract herself more. it was an endless cycle that would last for as long as amber was at the park without anything to do, but she would prefer that over being bored out of her mind and not even having the park to distract her. instant messaging online could only keep her interest for so long, since amber didn't enjoy talking to strangers on questionable chat rooms, which could possibly make her speak to some forty-six year old man pretending to be seventeen, and - well, you get the story. in addition, it wasn't fun when barely anyone was on, or when the only people on were people you had no interest in talking to. unfortunately, amber's buddy list consisted of a lot of those kinds of people. the ones where the conversation would begin with an exchange of "hello", "how are you doing?", "i'm fine.", and once all of that was complete, it would be nothing but pure, awkward silence and eventually a dead im box. fun? not really. if she wasn't going to talk to someone, amber would prefer to be alone in an environment that was more interesting than her room.
today was just one of those days. you know, the one where there was absolutely nothing on tv; well, nothing worth watching. going to the theaters didn't catch her interest when amber knew that she was going alone. how lame would it be if she appeared at mega screens alone and then bumped into someone? amber may have not been the kind of girl that cared much about social statuses and popularity much, but in the end, she was still a teenager girl who did, in fact, get embarrassed. if she were in that situation, she would have acted pretty chill, but probably feel incredibly lame. oh dear, she really need to make some more friends. if only amber would actually get along with half of the girls in valkyrie. if only she could find people that she could automatically click with, like alex; how they had met on the worst possible day in the history of valkyrie academy, yet keep each other calm with some small talk. and laughing. and smiling. and fun. gosh, how could she find so much joy in such a tragic day? hopefully, amber wouldn't need tragic days and problems to meet new people; if that were the case, she would probably feel better alone, or at least with her current friends. the girl had to admit that her friends could have very well been the definition for "bamf" in the dictionary. alex with her guitar was a perfect fit with amber's drum, not to mention how they made the perfect vlogging pair. how about hayden? that girl could do things with a camera that would blow your mind. nothing sexual implied, of course.
so yeah, amber malinda did have friends, and though she had no social problems and could be loud at times, she wasn't the girl in the neighborhood that went around to every house just to say hi. or the one that talked to someone random if the conversation didn't have the potential to entertain her. she wanted to get rid of her boredom, not keep it. at the same time, however, amber wouldn't ditch a person if they didn't have said potential. amber may have been a pest to teachers at school (she blamed it on her endless amounts of boredom; huh, she should really try to figure out a way to fix it, but boredom doesn't exactly equal productivity for her), but she wasn't rude to everyone. the only reason she may have made an excuse to leave someone she just met was if the person was a real bitch, or if things were just awkward. pauses and silences were not her thing, and neither were those failed ice breakers. "...uhhh... heyyy. nice weather today..?" yeah, that kind of thing didn't work for her, but when that guy sitting on the same bench as her spoke, she didn't hesitate to respond. the whole "stranger danger" thing wore off a long time ago. now she only really listened to it when she saw creepy men around. "it really is." amber said, smiling at the flowers that still were around despite it being november. oh, california. she then turned to the park boy and asked, "you come here often?" her head was tilted like a confused dog, her face full of peace and curiosity. amber only slightly analyzed who she was talking to. he doesn't look like a creeper. amber thought to herself, but hey, you can't really judge a book by its cover. nonetheless, amber was sure that she'd figure him out in a few minutes if there were no awkward turtles involved.
- - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - NOTES • sorry for the wait! and gosh, it's so rambly. -.- WORD COUNT • 1232 . LET'S FLAUNT IT • click . TAGGED • graham / ruby . SETTING • saturday around two at the valkyrie park . CREDITS • lyrics to 2ne1; format & banner by me.
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Post by Graham McCarthy on Jun 21, 2010 9:49:38 GMT -6
VALKYRIE PARK, AFTERNOON, NOVEMBER 2007 [/font][/center] -----graham knew nothing of responsibilities. in fact it was one of the hardest things he'd had to learn since transitioning into the real world. growing up as a kid he'd never been responsible for anything but himself. that was easy enough because no one else had cared to give a damn about him, leaving graham to be the only one to care about his welfare. he took things into his own hands when he needed to. he fed himself when no one else would, drank when he got the chance because no one would stop and give him a glass of water. he bathed whenever he got the chance, because they were few and far between. graham didn't go door to door hoping for charity. he couldn't stand it. he didn't want someone to see his situation and pity him because pity wasn't what he wanted. he didn't want someone to take him in simply because they felt sorry for him. he didn't want to be treated differently because he'd been in situations people could only dream of. he wanted to be treated like any other kid. if anything did change, graham wanted it to be the way people reacted to people living on the streets. graham wasn't the only kid out there, but he sure as hell was one of the only ones to get a leg up in life thanks to the mccarthys. he'd never heard a story of another homeless kid being picked up and now living in a mansion. that crap was something to be heard as the plot line for some cheesy movie. hell he could probably sell the rights to his story to hollywood. they'd eat it up like a fat kid did cake. if he was looking for attention, maybe he would. maybe somewhere down the line graham could do it, the proceeds going to homeless kids living on the streets or something like that. see? deep down underneath that awkward, antisocial shell was a kid with a heart. he just hadn't seen the light of day in so long that "normal" graham seemed like a distant memory.
-----how boring would his story be though? aside from the homes and the many beatings, there would just be scenes of endless walking, hiding away in a wal-mart until it closed, going to a homeless shelter, and digging crap out of trash cans for food. that couldn't possibly be that interesting could it? was it really a story that people would want to hear. most americans were happily oblivious. they see a dirty kid walking the streets and they assume he was out playing with his friends. it never occurs to them to look at his shoes and how worn they were, or to see his torn clothes. all they saw was a dirt-smudged face and all they thought was a playful boy. as long as they could go home to their big houses that was scrubbed clean by hired maids, they didn't care about the world outside their doors. people didn't like seeing the truth. they didn't like seeing the hell that a majority of the world went through because they were happy. happy trumped the truth any day of the week didn't it? it seemed to be that way. people were too concerned about their outward appearances to give a damn about the world that was really just a hop, skip, and a jump away. they didn't notice the homeless kids walking the streets because they were too busy primping and polishing themselves for a night on the town, or too busy in their swarm of friends to take into account the people struggling under the bridge. it was a cruel world outside, when you really looked at it. it was a cruel, heartless world that would change you and mold you in order for you to survive in it. because if you didn't mold and change the way the world demanded, that spelled the end for you. you didn't sit on the corner and beg, that usually just lead to a beating from stupid kids who didn't know any better. you just stayed to yourself, cut yourself off from every emotion, and you ran on instinct.
-----it was hard to let go of all that he'd learned in the past just to he could live a normal life. it was hard shaking off that feeling that he couldn't talk to anyone because it might get him killed. it was hard to pick up that life of materialism when you were so used to having nothing. even having a cushy bed to sleep in at night felt wrong. everything about this life felt wrong because it was always something the world had told him he didn't need as a kid. trying to get past everything you'd ever known was right in order to embrace this new life was hard, even a year later. graham liked to think that he was making progress. he'd started sleeping in the bed, though the rug on the floor had been plenty for him. he still couldn't sleep through the night, but he supposed he'd need another year or so for that too. then came the things that he'd never been prepared for like taxes, looking forward to colleges, actually getting a gpa seeing as how this was his first year in a school, being smart enough to graduate was a challenge enough for him. even things like getting a job, making a stable amount of money and all that seemed like an impossible task. too many responsibilities. way too many responsibilities. it felt like a huge weight on his shoulder. nothing had ever been so much of a challenge as weaseling his way into the real world. nothing had ever felt so difficult.
-----graham wasn't usually the first one to speak up so it was strange that he had. maybe this was a sign of progress. he looked over at saw her smile, thankful that it wasn't aimed at him. graham wasn't a big smiler, then again he usually never had the reason to. he was still looking her way when she turned to him, making him turn his gaze away. "sometimes. i like the quiet and the outdoors." he shrugged and looked back again. "i'm graham." he didn't offer her a hand or anything, he just said it in a matter of fact way before he leaned back against the bench a little further.
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status • finished words • 1271 tagged • gramber ! clothes • click listening to • secrets - onerepublic. notes • --.
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Post by Amber Malinda on Jul 19, 2010 13:16:30 GMT -6
a part of amber felt ashamed for not doing something like this enough in her life. ask her when was the last time she stopped to cherish the beauties of nature, and she wouldn't have an answer for you. when she was a little girl, all that really mattered to her were toys and just playing. as she grew older, she had an obsession with various things. pokemon, neopets... let's just say a lot of time was wasted due to the computer and video games. when amber started really growing into the teenager stage, she was playing drums, skateboarding, making video logs, not to mention trying to balance school and all the work her aunt made her do. when she finally escaped her aunt, she was in valkyrie with relatives she hadn't know she had before searching online (yay for google), and then her brother had came in town and ruined her peace and freedom. that was pretty much a summary of her sad autobiography, but where in that book was a time when she did what she was doing now? when she just paused for a moment and stopped running around to appreciate nature? no doubt this guilty procrastinator had paused in the midst of her busy life before, but it wasn't so she could look around her and see everything. the sky, the ocean, the plants. even the air! okay, maybe not the air, though it really depended on the place since she wasn't going to breathe in the smell of smoke or whatever that smell was when she was in the city. something to do with pollution, perhaps? maybe she should have paid attention to that in class. nonetheless, no matter what aspect of nature it was, amber knew she must have took the time to look around before, yet she didn't have a single memory. manhattan may have been filled with buildings and luxurious stores for stuck up people, but it also had parks and so on.
fifteen. she was only fifteen years old, and was going to turn seventeen soon, yet her life was passing so quickly. what happened to the days when amber could just play and maybe do a little work, and yet she still had all this time left over? what happened to the times when christmas felt like forever away at the middle of the year, and she couldn't wait for her next birthday? when school was simple and there was recess. now amber was fifteen, and new year's day felt like just a week ago. christmas was coming to soon, and she was getting older and older. she was at an age when she should have been happier to age, but amber was scared of growing up. she didn't know what to expect, or what her future was going to be like. what was she going to do with her life? what if she was a forty year old virgin with eighty cats after buying a new cat each time she got dumped? she didn't even get to celebrate her quinceanera. the whole fancy formal idea wasn't her thing, but it was something she had always looked forward to, though she'd only reluctantly admit that to the closest of her friends, yet her fifteenth birthday was long gone. she didn't get to do any ceremony where she moved from flats to heels. she didn't get to dance with her father in a poofy dress she'd say she despised, but truthfully loved feeling like a princess in. running away from home wasn't perfect, but the least she could do was stop focusing on the things she missed out on and more on what she was doing now. it should have made her realize that she needed to go out on an adventure. life was too short to be stuck in this town.
ugh. maybe this was exactly why amber malinda didn't take the time to go to the park and the beach to just relax often. when she relaxed, she often just thought and thought. her mind would be in a completely different state than it was in the most time. her thoughts would be much more meaningful and she'd think and think until she had nothing left to think about. for some people, that would be a great thing. that's exactly why they relaxed; to think about their life and what they should do; to chill for a second and think about rainbows, unicorns, and happy things in general. so why was it that when amber malinda started thinking, she regretted it? it just brought her attention to her problems in her life. the things that she had been trying to avoid. all her worries that she had thrown out the window and covered up with fun and trouble, because she was too scared to face them. all her fears that no one knew and would never find out about. so many things she wanted to cover up and forget about. no one would ever understand how she thought wendy was foolish for leaving neverland. why would you want to grow up? captain hook may have been a pain in the ass, but come on. then again, wendy had parents who cared, and no evil aunt. then there was how amber didn't want to tell anyone that she secretly felt like maybe this was a fairytale. maybe she was in her own fairytale. amber malinda in a cinderella like story. a girl growing up in manhattan who had a bitch as an aunt and a douche as a brother. then she ran away to california. ... then what? where was her prince charming?
maybe that's why amber had a sense of relief when the guy came to take a seat on the same bench. no, not because she suspected that he was her prince charming or anything of that sort, but because once he started speaking, that meant that she would have a distraction. though he didn't seem like he wanted to do much talking, a part of her hoped he would open up to her and they'd be in a full conversation, filled with laughs and seriousness. and if that wasn't happening, at least she'd have a slight distraction with their awkward, short responses to each other until one left, which would probably be amber since she didn't do awkward, and she'd probably want to get out of the park as soon as possible when she realized how much she was thinking. "sometimes. i like the quiet and the outdoors." huh, there was amber's peek into this guy. so far she knew that he liked quiet, which meant she would probably have to go soon if he wasn't going to start talking. it was amazing how much she feared facing the truth sometimes. "i'm graham." and now she also knew that his name was graham. she had the random urge to make some sort of comment about her love for teddy grahams (the original honey flavor, of course), but resisted, since it seemed out of place in the conversation and her thoughts. "the name's amber." she said. after her eyes looked over the same view of the park as before, (it was a wonder how she hadn't gotten tired of seeing the same thing again yet), amber spoke, "don't take this the wrong way, but" she turned to look at graham and continued casually, "i'm a bit surprised to see that someone my age is here, just appreciating the park." she didn't sound rude in the slightest bit, since that wasn't her intention, but amber had always thought that teenagers like herself didn't even remember that the beauties of the outdoors existed, but she had obviously been wrong.
- - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - NOTES • wow, took me almost a month. fail. WORD COUNT • 1286 . LET'S FLAUNT IT • click . TAGGED • graham / ruby . SETTING • saturday around two at the valkyrie park . CREDITS • lyrics to 2ne1; format & banner by me.
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