---ocean and atlantic*

[Seriah Worthington]

`SERA FAYE`` `VALKYRIE``
`CALIFORNIA``

she'll be the secret you can keep !
--va carnival--evening--

---It was insane to see how different things were now than they’d been just a year ago, even just six months ago. Thinking about the past wasn’t something done fondly, but she could be thankful for the present without feeling physically sick. She had been living with her newly found brother and his adoptive parents for a few months now, and it really changed her life for the better. Sometimes she didn’t feel all too rooted in to the family, or she felt like she just was out of the loop since they had so many memories that she wasn’t a part of. It was a little unsettling, uncomfortable, and made her feel a bit out of the loop, but none of that mattered at all. She appreciated them, and cared about them more than she’d ever cared about any single person. They got on like a family in movies, like the perfect ones who never fought. Maybe they just had been on their best behavior for the past few months, but she couldn’t picture Jessica fighting with anybody, Harry was just plain mellow, and Teddy was a goofball. They were like three pieces to a puzzle that fit together in perfect harmony, and she was the one being forced onto the rest. None of them ever seemed to mind she was a part of their little threesome now, giving it a one plus, they didn’t seem to struggle more with money now that she was in the picture, no one ever complained or talked behind her back (as far as she knew), but somehow Seriah still felt like an intruder. They didn’t make her perceive her stay there that way, but it was an internal thing. She felt like a guest who had long overstayed their visit, or a burden. When she’d first moved in she had apologized to everyone a lot about money or taking up room, and they’d all gotten absolutely livid with her for even mentioning it. So Sera stopped, though she didn’t cease to think about it or consider it that way. It wasn’t that they didn’t make her feel welcome, it was simply that they were too perfect, and Seriah Worthington was a pessimist. She was still waiting for some tragedy to occur, something that would send her back to New York or into permanent foster care. What if she screwed up and they got sick of her? She hadn’t done anything bad, not because of that conclusion, but because she really just wasn’t interested in participating with the rioting rebels or the plastic people. Alcohol had been something she’d always been strongly against since she could remember, and well, most of those parties or crowds involved it more than necessary, and even with Teddy prodding her to get out and have a bit more fun, well, she just wasn’t feeling the whole deal. She’d witnessed first hand what alcohol could do to people overtime, and frankly, she didn’t want to become a victim, not if she could help it. Her life was something she finally had control over. She finally had a bit of free agency, and well, she wasn’t willing to give that up for a bottle of booze.

---Sera had always been fairly independent, and she didn’t mind being alone at all, so when the question Would you like to go to church with us? came up that Sunday evening from her newly adopted family, she declined. They were all a bit disappointed, but went anyway, not bothering to question her, for which she was grateful. Church seemed like something the three of them did, and it really wasn’t something Seriah was interested in. She didn’t think about God much, or tried not to. It wasn’t that she didn’t believe, but she wasn’t faithful in the idea either. It was just easier to float through life without questioning it, because if she did then she’d begin to wonder why the hell she’d gone through all the crap from her past, and why he’d let that happen. She wanted to believe in some loving, perfect man in the sky who cared for her more than she could comprehend. She wanted to believe that sins were forgiven as long as she repented for them. However, she couldn’t wrap her mind around it, and going to a chapel would just make her that much more uncomfortable. Church wasn’t something she’d ever been a part of as a child, and it was hard for her to just jump into the swing of it at the age of seventeen. Maybe one day she would grow up and get to that emotional place in her life where religion made sense, but until that day came she was all for evading it at all costs. So they left for their session or whatever it was they went to, and Seriah stayed home. The girl was restless though, and sitting in any one place for too long made her anxious. The television just wasn’t entertaining enough, the computer lifeless, music annoying. Nothing held any interest for her in the house at the time. So naturally, Sera figured she was going to get out of the house. How often did she go out and tour Valkyrie? Well, never. There were plenty of parts around this town she was completely oblivious to. The shaks, or part of them, was something she was somewhat familiar with. She knew the area around the academy fairly well, and of course she was pretty situated when it came to the beach, but what else was there in this city? California had to be a little more creative than just relying on their perfect fairytale beaches to attract its resident’s attention. The ocean was great and all, but it was nice to switch things up here and there. A food joint was out of the question. Too much intimacy involved in them. She was desiring something loud and thought-scattering, something to keep her busy and scrutinizing so that way she would be picking herself or any one thing in general apart. A crowded place with lots of people, hopefully most of them with friends or family so they wouldn’t bother coming to have a chat with a lone stranger. Somewhere like a carnival.

---The car was waiting for her, just outside. Could she take it without asking? Definitely not, she wasn’t that well attached to this family yet. They wouldn’t be happy. She texted Jessica quietly, and got a bit paranoid and stupid feeling after she sent it. Of course she’d say no. They didn’t trust her yet. To her surprise though, Jess answered with a quick “yes!” and that was that. In all reality, Jessica was absolutely thrilled Sera had even been comfortable enough to bother asking. Seriah, still hesitant, grabbed her stuff and they keys, and went out to the car. She was a pretty good driver, even though her license had only recently been given to her since she got her permit late due to her former situation. If she wrecked this car though, she’d probably send herself into total isolated exile. The very though of ruining the old chevy truck made her want to choke. For a moment she almost got out, but decided against it. What were the odds, right?

---She started it up and was off. It was a bit thrilling to see the carnival lights coming up closely. They glittered and danced in the darkening sky, complimented by the classic California sunset as a backdrop scenery. Sera was half tempted to stop the car where it was and enjoy the view, that’d be enough… but she was here, so she might as well put better use to it than watching a sunset, which she could have done from the beach near her house. She found a spot to park in the crowded lot, then got out in silence and made her way through the accumulating waves of people. It was a vivacious place, just as she’d perceived it would be. There were contests going on, strange looking people running them, most of them much too animated, cotton candy was everywhere, and the rides were letting off screams from their passengers periodically. All the cliché, expected things were there, along with some originality. Seriah was content. She felt a lot less agitated. She recognized a few people here and there from school, but nobody who was going to bother speaking with her, which she didn’t mind at all. Her expression was fairly placid as she weaved through groups with folded arms. When she came to a stand that seemed to be selling refreshments, she jumped in line and got herself a bottle of water. The vendor was a bit rude, but Seriah through her sassy ways right back at the woman and left bitterly with her water. Lord, how she hated people. Not little kids, but all other people excluding them. They seemed to exist to vex her. For example, every damn bench or table in the entire perimeter was taken, and by idiots in the same group who just wanted to spread out too. It was infuriating. Finally she came to a lonely bench without a butt glued to it or a junkie pair playing tongue hockey. Thank the heavens above. Sera took her seat, sipping on her lemonade. The bright sunset oranges and pinks were fading in the sky, which almost made her smile because the pitch black sky was something she couldn’t help but adore.

TAGGED;; whoever!
STATUS;;complete!
WORDS;; 1,592
NOTES;; it kind of really sucks, buut i wanted to post with her..
OUTFIT;; aqui!
MUSE MUSIC;; moments between sleep - versaemerge
LYRICS;; ocean and atlantic – mayday parade

[Artemis Ellis]

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she could feel what were surely all of the muscles in her body tensing with anger with the passing of each moment. honest to god, she wasn't sure how much more of this she was going to be able to put up with before she just stormed downstairs and told the two of them to just get a god damned fucking divorce already. nothing, absolutely nothing, seemed more tempting right then and there, as she lay supine across her cushy, silky, expensive comforter, atop her queen sized bed, biting down on the inside of one cheek and staring furiously up at her ceiling.

the raised voices of her parents engaged in an animated and passionate argument, though faint, were, quite unfortunately, still able to perforate artie's range of hearing. it wasn't as if this was a horribly unusual sound, of course. over the years, the sound of her parents fighting had become a typical backdrop in her household environment. after the first few tens of incidents, the affects they tended to have on her (causing anxiety and distress, mostly) became less and less sharp and resilient and became more and more dull and stolid. and then came the point where they were just nothing, the relative equivalent of a rather feisty white noise, something you were more than capable of tuning out if you even managed to notice it at all. nowadays, it was only once in a very great while that artie thought anything of her parents' battling voices, and these instances generally only occurred when she happened to be in the same room with the both of them while it was happening (because, try as she might, it was hard to ignore two screaming people standing within ten feet of you). that was when she usually started to get pissed off. due to how she became so very aware of how they were being a couple of naive little whiny bitches for refusing to accept the fact that they needed a divorce.

now was such a time. she wasn't actually in the same room as they were. but she was sure as hell still getting pissed off.

maybe it was just because she'd been in a bad mood to begin with, what with an annoying series of events having unfolded earlier in the day. and maybe it was just because she had nothing suitable to distract herself with. she had felt like socializing, but everyone she would have wanted to hang out with was either busy or being a giant ass hat. and lord knew lazing about the house wasn't going to be any damn fun, either. she might have opted for yet another shopping excursion, but... ugh. doing it alone just felt so lame. were it a trip prompted by necessity and not boredom, it may have been a different story. but that wasn't the case. recreational shopping trips really were just not the same when she didn't have tristan silver, one of her favorite new cronies, with her.

and just lying here, seething, was striking her as more and more lame, as well.

in an acrimonious huff, she sat up and threw her pale, slender legs over the edge of her bed and slid onto the plush carpet on her knees. she was pretty sure she had a bottle of some sort of alcohol stashed away under her bed. after a couple of moments of rummaging, laying flattened on the floor so that she she could get a visual of the area she was scouring, a half filled bottle of gray goose popped up. chyeah. propping herself back up into a sitting position against her bed, she took a quick swig. it was oddly unsatisfying. seemed to only thrust her into a more acute degree of frustration.

well. fuck that.

snapping up onto her feet, she stomped out of her room, the neck of her bottle of vodka clutched in a death grip in her left hand. she made her way down the hallway and down the stairs, making as much noise as possible as the sound of her parents' argument become progressively louder and louder. once she reached the ground floor, it became evident that they were in the kitchen, and she breezed by the archway to said part of the house without a wayward glance. she wanted to get the fuck out of this damn house. that was currently all her bitter, belligerant brain was capable of being concerned about. she stopped abruptly in the entryway when she saw milo standing with one hand on the doorknob, the other holding a pair of keys. she was rather surprised that he wasn't holing up in his room, seeing as that was what he did most of the time. in fact, artie had figured out that, ninety percent of the time, if he wasn't in his room, he was either somewhere with his girlfriend sophie or at class. rather boring little existence he led.

"where are you going?" she snapped. milo opened his mouth to presumably answer, but artie didn't give him any time. "never mind. i don't give a fuck. just take me with you." milo gave her a look that was an interesting mix of alarm and mild exasperation and sighed. "fine." with a quick toss of her head, artie stalked out the door ahead of him and settled herself into the passenger's seat of her mother's car, for which milo had presumably braved intruding upon the world war three taking place in their kitchen to get permission to drive. god. what artie wouldn't give for her own damn car. it wasn't fair. milo seemed to know that she definitely was in no suitable state for any sort of conversation whatsoever, because he kept very quiet as he started up the car and started driving to wherever it was they were going. then again, maybe he was just being his usual very non-verbose little self. it wasn't like the two cousins talked much at all, anyway, under any number of circumstances. especially not lately, what with artie going out a lot more. she honestly had nothing against the kid, she in fact was pretty fond of him, they just hardly seemed to cross paths anymore. plus, she was pretty sure that he was sort of afraid of her.

she slouched back lazily against the comfortable material of the front seat, her brow furrowed as she watched the lights of the small city and other cars pass by the windows. though it wasn't particularly late in the evening, the official beginning winter was quickly approaching, so it was already becoming quite dark. an irritated sigh welling up in her lungs, she took another swig of her gray goose. milo cast a sideways glance at her from the corner of his eye. "you shouldn't be drinking that." oh god. artie rolled her eyes. "and yet i am. i'm a rebel like that." she didn't need any crap or concerned admonishments from him right now, thank you very much. leaning her head against the cool glass of her window, she caught of something that piqued her interest. the rapidly moving and brightly colored lights of valkyrie's very own carnival. "you know what?" she said. "just pull over and let me out here." milo gave her an unsure look but complied nonetheless. he knew her too well to try and bother arguing with her.

and this was how she found herself meandering through the vivid and theatrical scene that was valkyrie's carnival, gray goose in hand. she didn't pay much mind to her surroundings, though several times, a game would catch her eye and she would humor herself for a few moments, place her vodka momentarily on the ground, and have a quick go at it. she didn't manage to win anything, probably because the damn things were effing rigged, and soon lost interest in the games altogether. so, she began to wander around in search of a place to just sit for a while. this whole thing seemed to be turning into an exercise in triviality. not that she gave a damn, lots of her impulses turned out that way... oh. there. finally, a free seat. it was a bench, already half occupied by a girl who looked kinda sorta possibly vaguely familiar but relatively harmless. so artie plopped down next to her. and though she was finding herself less and less interested in her gray goose, she took another very small drink before simply staring down at it in distaste for a moment, before turning to the girl she had seated herself next to. "want some?" she asked disinterestedly, holding up the bottle.

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STATUS finished.
TAGGED seriah. :]
WHEN & WHERE december '07, carnival.
THREADS on the left.
CREDITS lyrics: matt & kim. formatting: me.
NOTES wooo.

[/font]

[Seriah Worthington]

`SERA FAYE`` `VALKYRIE``
`CALIFORNIA``

she'll be the secret you can keep !
--va carnival--evening--

---Lord, what was she even doing here? other than the scenery, and the noise, there wasn't much around this scene that was really drawing any of sera's attention. these people were uninteresting, the games were all specialized to jip somebody out of their money, and the whole "couples" thing that was going on was really starting to annoy her. but she had to admit, this was better than sitting around it that house waiting for her family to get back from worshipping god. or better yet, it was much prefered to actually attending this religious session. there was no way in hell you were going to catch her in a church, at least not until she was dead and at her own funeral. religion wasn't something worth thinking about, so no matter how happy it would make jessica if she attended, sera would have nothing of it. they could do other family bonding activities. but god? no way. she didn't want to think about him or thank him. what did she have to thank him for? sure, her new family, but she found them, she wrote the letter... it wasn't like they miraculously appeared at her doorstep, delivered out of god's golden hand. she did it. she saved herself.

---So here she sat, bored and alone... though she didn't really mind the latter. sera wasn't one of those girls who needed to be accompanied by somebody at all times, or ever really. she didn't care to be with people or at parties. none of that was really her thing. as far as she was concerned, she'd dealt with people enough for a life time. they just caused trouble, so what was the point of putting yourself out there. people sucked, it was simple. she had yet to meet anybody who she could get along with who wasn't related to her somehow. it wasn't like she went out and joined in parties, or was ever even invited to them. she didn't recieve the mass texts or anything of that sort. it didn't bother her though. it wasn't like anybody understood her or what she'd been through. granted, it wasn't like seriah was going around trying to get pity from people by sharing her story. in fact, she'd never told anybody willingly about it. yeah, she was also kind of a bitch, so that could be a big factor as to why she didn't have any real friends. it wasn't a problem though. this whole suffering in silence thing didn't affect her much. it was nice, even. who needs friends, right?

---As she lounged on that empty bench, scrutinizing the people who walked to an fro, this way and that, she recognized a few here and there, and then some were complete strangers. she managed to pick out something negative about each and every person. none of them were that great, all of them a bit stuck up, thinking they were better in some way or another. she wondered how many of these people her brother associated with on a daily basis or goofed off with when the weekend came around he'd always been a lot more outgoing than her as far as she could tell. everybody seemed to like him, but she couldn't blame them. he was honestly one of the most likable kids she'd ever met, twin-biased opinion or not. he was popular, basically. she wasn't. and for that she was absolutely grateful. he was even on the local town tabloid terrorist's list. scandal star or whatever. he was so well known it almost made her laugh. she wondered how many people knew they were twins. did he tell people about it? or was he embarrassed? it didn't really make a difference, but curiosity sometimes burned the soul.

---All of a sudden, shattering her little reverie, seriah noticed somebody had decided to take a seat on her bench. for a second she was rather annoyed and a million fiery comments popped into her mind of what to say or how to insult this girl, but she decided against it and just looked forward. it wasn't like the broad was disturbing her. this girl looked semi-familiar, but not so much that she'd ever be able to guess her name. just another face from school, she guessed. the stranger probably had no idea what seriah's name was either, so it wasn't like she had some sort of obligation to recognize her on spot or anything. sera could vaguely smell the alcohol the girl carried. she was pretty against the stuff, considering she witnessed first hand how it had poisoned anthony, her ex-father. what the hell, though. if this girl wanted to drink it up, more power to her. suddenly she offered it to seriah. for a second, sera almost considered trying it, just a swig. i mean, it wasn't like one sip would destroy the rest of her life, and turn her into an abusive bastard. teddy drank, and he was still alright. plus, tonight was so dull that it almost seemed like the release she'd been looking for.

---Fuck it, might as well. "what the hell," seriah muttered flatly. she took the offered bottle, and took a hesitant little sip. a soon as she'd taken it in though, she spat it out and coughed, "shit," she managed between the spasms going on in her lungs, "another reason why i don't drink,"

[/color] she handed the bottle back to the girl, feeling like an idiot for even trying. she picked her lemonade back up and drank the rest of it to take the bitter, almost burning taste out of her mouth. it was the first time she'd ever drinken alcohol in her life, any sort of it... and this random girl was the one who got her to do it. astounding. when sera finally felt the stinging in her throat subside, she looked at the girl, her eyebrows knitting together and her lips pulling down at the corners, "that shit is nasty," she announced very matter-of-factly, "and i'm seriah."
[/blockquote][/blockquote]

TAGGED;; artie!
STATUS;;complete!
WORDS;; didn't count.
NOTES;; i hope it's sufficient. lol. i feel rusty.
OUTFIT;; aqui!
MUSE MUSIC;; save you - kelly clarkson
LYRICS;; ocean and atlantic – mayday parade

[Artemis Ellis]

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come to think of it, she didn't think she had ever been to a carnival before. apparently there hadn't been very many opportunities to attend one back in new york city, and artie was willing to bet that throughout a healthy portion of her life, she would have been in severe want of the inclination to do so, anyway. because there had been a long, extended period of time during which she hadn't felt any particular urge to go out to much of anywhere at all, most characteristically marked by her considerably higher percentage of body fat. those had been her bitter years, when she had spent most of her time skulking around in her bedroom or taking lazy, meandering strolls around central park, making up stories of hideous doom involving all the aesthetically pleasing people she happened to lay eyes on.

she had actually been doing that sporadically this evening, as well, though she hadn't been discriminating against solely the aesthetically pleasing people in her selections for the main characters in her ghastly little tales. she had picked pretty much anyone who chanced to irritate her, for whatever very obscure reason. only rarely was there a decent method to any madness of artemis ellis's.

the girl that she had situated herself next to was not one of the innocent, random recipients of artie's capricious disaffection. in fact, based solely on looks and they way she seemed to hold herself and took in what was going on around her, artie didn't think she seemed half bad. of course, the girl had yet to open her mouth, so artie was quite prepared for this initial impression to jump ship whenever necessary as things progressed. a small part of her... actually no, it was a rather sizeable part, actually wanted this girl to turn out to be some unpleasant uber bitch so that artie would have the opportunity to argue with her and yell at her, just to vent some of the frustration and anger that was still buzzing through her system, along with the relatively small amount of recently consumed vodka. she had learned over the years that sometimes all it took was a nice shouting match with someone to expend her various vexations and grievances. especially since it was significantly difficult to best her in a shouting match, seeing as how she had that whole mulishly stubborn and occasionally unreasonable factor going for her.

the girl, whoever she was, took a few momentss to cogitate at artie's detached offer of alcohol before acquiescing with a definite air of having given in against some better judgment. "what the hell." she relieved artie of the bottle and took a tentative looking swig. however, it apparently did not go over very well, because she immediately spit it right back out and was overtaken by a pretty good coughing fit. pitiful. artie didn't think she'd ever had a reaction to vokda to a similar degree as this particular one. sure, her first time, she had choked a little, but she hadn't coughed it up. in fact, she was actually probably in the minority of girls her age in that she often preferred the harder drinks like gray goose over the fruiter stuff. it was definitely and acquired taste, yes, but she like the warm, burrning feeling it created going down her throat and then seeping through her chest.

"shit." the girl managed to spit out the one syllable cuss word between coughs. "another reason why i don't drink." she returned the bottle to artie, who paused to take a somewhat capacious gulp, partly to show the other girl who owned - just a teensy tiny itty bitty bit - before leanding forward, extending the bottle out in front of her and turning it upside down, watching its clear contents cascade and plummet into the grass at her feet. she had lost interest in it for now. getting drunk was definitely something she could do without tonight. she turned her head back towards her bench mate to cast her a steely grin. "pfft. you're giving up far, far too easily." a small breeze flickered through the area, and artie quickly tucked a strand of hair it had dislodged back behind her ear. "that shit is nasty." she declared it plainly, in a manner one would be apt to find surrounding someone stating that two and two equaled four. "that shit is about as good as vodka gets, cupcake," artie returned, a devious smile forming on her face, as she leaned back against the bench, casting her eyes skyward. the sun was sinking into a canvas of delicious pinks, oranges and purples... what was it exactly that made the sky take on those wonderful colors every morning and evening? artie was curious. "and i'm seriah."

huh. that was an interesting enough name, artie supposed. probably about as interesting as her own. yes, even though she didn't exactly care for the name artemis, it sure as hell wasn't boring. then again, artie wasn't exactly a boring name, per se... for a girl, at least. she nearly always went by it nowadays, because it was the nickname that had stuck after moving to valkyrie. 'missy' had been the more predominant one back in new york, and even then, most people had simply justed used her full name. funny how that stuff worked out. but artie had always been her favorite nickname, so she was happy that that had been the one to have picked up here. especially when you had those few people trying to refer to her as 'ar-teem-is' instead of 'ar-tem-is'. frigging irritated her.

"good to know. i'm artie."

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STATUS finished.
TAGGED seriah. :]
WHEN & WHERE december '07, carnival.
THREADS on the left.
CREDITS lyrics: matt & kim. formatting: me.
NOTES wooo.

[/font]

[Seriah Worthington]

`SERA FAYE`` `VALKYRIE``
`CALIFORNIA``

she'll be the secret you can keep !
--va carnival--evening--

---Was sera really happy, truly feeling joy, to be here at this carnival? not entirely, no. it was better than sitting in that god forsaken house that she'd been stuck in only a while ago, but it wasn't thrilling or bring sunshine and rainbows into her life. what ever would manage that though? she couldn't really remember the last time she'd been to a carnival on good terms. perhaps she'd gone when she was just a child, living in a world of bliss and carlessness with two adoring parents who could do no wrong. those days died long ago with any good disposition she once possessed. the only other time she could remember attending a carnival was when she was on one of her lonely, nowhere to stay, nights when she'd finally had enough of her damn father-figure and left for weeks out of a time. that time she'd been there simply in need of somewhere to get refuge far away from home. there wasn't much she could remember about that night, except that the local carnies told her it'd be fine if she just crashed in one of their many tents for the night. it wasn't the greatest sleep she'd ever recieved, but it was a hell of a lot better than red-eye beatings she didn't deserve. other than that, had she really ever come to a carnival just to have fun? no. they didn't hold much interest for this new, icy person she'd been forcibly molded into because of all the shit she'd gone through in the past years. games, rides, clowns... none of it was amusing. this was a child's place. a happy place. the only thing she found relieving about it was the noise, the lights, and the sunset. the kids were alright too. other than those few positive little aspects, there wasn't much she found intriguing.

---Seriah had never been much of a socialite. even when she was sleeping over at the houses of other people, it wasn't individuals she would refer to as friends or that she was even close with in any way. they were just kids form school, neighbors, kids who's mom's noticed the bruises sera wore shamelessly on her body and offered to let her stay with them when they discovered she really had no interest in going home. even as a teenage when she was hanging around a darker crowd, they weren't friends. friendship required trust, and that wasn't a foundation she shared with the majority of those people. they didn't really know what went on in her life, and she never felt inclined to wear her heart on her sleeve. so instead it was just other kids with carless parents who didn't give a damn if she lived there for a week or two. in fact, at some times she didn't even really associate with the people she was living with. seriah had always been fairly isolated at heart. moving here didn't really help much. teddy was her friend, but he was also her long lost brother. jessica could be considered a friend, but she was her new adoptive mother. and harry, she just thought of him like the typical dad who would drag out his most prized shotgun to a boy who had interest in her. they were the only three people she could ever recall connecting to on a normal human level. people just weren't her thing. the closest she came to having non-relative friends were the people she could tolerate. there really were only two personalities that existed in the girl's mind. the people she would like to imagine strangling, and the people she could sit next to without feeing like she was recieving some sort of telepathic brain damage.

---Alcohol, all forms of it, including vodka, were utterly vile. what could really came out of the drink that twisted your head, sometimes so far around that the former person became unrecognizable within it? there wasn't much good in it, not really. some people claimed it helped you forget all the crap going on in life, all the negative things that gnawed away at the heart of people until they had nothing but a black whole. well yeah, she knew it could help people forget. it helped anthony forget what a decent human being was supposed to act like. now he was in jail. congradulations, liquor. then it just helped some people have more fun. well fuck that. fun didn't exist. not in seriah's work, and being a wasted idiot wasn't going to change that ordeal at all. maybe her brain just didn't work right. perhaps it was on an a.m. wavelength while everybody else on the entire planet's was on an f.m. that might be why she thought differently about things so many people loved. or maybe she was just scarred, bruised, and broken... but like hell would she ever learn to accept that excuse. seriah wasn't one who liked pity. she wasn't down with looking like the charity case, the person who needed help and love and compassion to function in life. that was anything but who she was. it was part of the reason why she acted like such a mega bitch all the time. if she created strong feelings of disliking in people, well they weren't going to try and figure her out or be her best friend. it was a much perferred scenario than becoming a therapy subject to a high school student. that wasn't going to help anything in the long run. nobody was going to be able to fix her. she wouldn't allow it. she didn't need to be fixed because she wasn't broken. hitting walls and getting scars onyl built character and made people into who they were. frankly, seriah didn't mind who she was. it wasn't something she found point in being discontented with.

---This girl next to her seemed like an alright sort, not somebody who was going to send the fire through her veins, but then again, sera wasn't exactly in the best mood around. her emotions were feeling like wild-cards right now, you could draw anything and get any result. she may be mild feeling or scorching status. only time and progression into the conversation would tell. one little phrase could send the shit to the fan. seriah rolled her eyes disintrestedly when the girl chugged a sip of the vodka and then poured it out. awesome, you were pro at getting wasted. want a cookie? "then give up i shall," she retorted, her eyes narrowing a little, "and i'm not your cupcake, love,"

[/color] seriah snapped, looking forward with her teeth clenched and jaw flexing slightly. pet names were something she didn't take much of a liking to. after seriah had so generously tossed her name out there, the girl replied with her own and sera gave a slight nod of acknowledgment, "no offense,"[/color] she began, her lip twitching, it wasn't like she really cared if she gave offense, "but why the hell are you at this little 'fun fest'"[/color] she layed the sarcastic, mock enthusiasm around the words fun fest on heavy, "with a bottle of vodka? really now, love? you could do better."[/color]
[/blockquote][/blockquote]

TAGGED;; artie!
STATUS;;complete!
WORDS;; didn't count.
NOTES;; ---
OUTFIT;; aqui!
MUSE MUSIC;; secret valentine - we the kings
LYRICS;; ocean and atlantic – mayday parade

[Artemis Ellis]

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maybe if it weren't for all the creepy, skanky looking carnies hanging around scamming everybody out of their money, artie was pretty sure that this whole carnival scene could have been a relatively cheerful, heart warming one. excluding some key things from her approximate range of vision, that is. seeing horny teenagers make out was never, ever heart warning. but the actual carnival part of the area was nice, people playing games, laughing, being happy - often even despite of getting ripped off by said games - , eating cotton candy, all the lights and sounds goading at the senses. oh, and let's not forget the heart warming, trademark american scent of greasy, sugary food permeating the air. it looked like it could have maybe been a picture on some sort of post card somewhere.

though, speaking of food, artie was feeling kind of hungry. she hadn't eaten since, like... some time early this afternoon. she didn't remember when exactly it had been, but all she had consumed was a banana and half of some sort of salad, it had had chicken on it and it hadn't been very good... thrown her appetite off, it had. it would probably actually do her some good to get a bit of food into her system, because, if she hadn't known it before, living in valkyrie had taught her that vodka on an empty stomach couldn't equate to much of anything but trouble. hm. maybe she would grab a jumbo cotton candy thing later.... she was ninety eight percent certain that she had placed a small wad of money somewhere in one of the pockets of her jeans earlier today. she had come into the habit of making sure she had cash on her lately, even if she wasn't carrying a purse, simply to account for the contingency of an impromptu shopping trip. and, lately, those were happening more and more, more than they ever had before in valkyrie. for it seemed that the habits she had picked up from her popular, shopaholic friends back in new york city had died after the bouts of depression she had experienced after the abortion... and they had stayed dead for quite a while, because the depressions had dispersed around the time of the migration to california. and then she had met and epically befriended dallas james hadley and the whole big shopper and fashion bug thing hadn't really been her scene anymore. but now she had tristan silver as one of her main amigos and dj... well, he was being complicated and, so, the big shopping trips had worked their way back into her normal schedule.

her feisty little 'i can't handle vodka' bench mate didn't look like one of valkyrie's infamous valk girls... in fact, she kind of just looked normal. normal meaning... well, actually, artie wasn't even sure how in the hell she even defined normal anymore in this fucked up town. but the chick, seriah, was definitely in some kind of minority among the teenage population of valkyrie in that she didn't take too friendly to alcohol.

"then give up i shall. and i'm not your cupcake, love." artie cast her a scornful glance, most from the corners of her eyes, because she kept her head facing what was directly in front of her. placing the bottle with a clunk on the wood of the area of the bench within a few inches of her leg, artie gripped it loosely by the neck and twisted it around, the base circumnavigating itself against the wood. "what a pity," she said, bring her gaze back to seriah, not feeling very impressed with her little truculent display. "i'm sure vodka all over the world just took a generous hit to their self esteem." and there was her typical weirdo commentary.

"no offense - " oh, this was probably going to be good. "but why the hell are you at this little 'fun fest' with a bottle of vodka? really now, love? you could do better."

hm. relatively good question, actually.

she had the vodka because, somehow, at some point in time, downing some alcohol had become associated with both getting rid of frustrations and anger and getting back at her parents for being such ridiculous jack asses. she was at the carnival because the olios of glimmering lights had appealed to her from the car for whatever obscure reason, and she had figured what the hell and given in to her impulse. maybe that didn't make the greatest amount of sense to everyone, but artie didn't really give much of a flying fuck, anyway. what did it even matter, that she had shown up here, at the carnival, pissed off and bearing alcohol? it wasn't like she was drunk and being an ass hat or anything. nor was it like she was acting like some sort of pathetic mess. she was feeling belligerent and angry, that was all. and no one had questioned her up until now, either. not any of adults or authority officials. then again, she had been surreptitious and moving quickly, not drawing a lot of attention to herself. and, hell, maybe they were just plain moronic had just assumed she was toting around bottled water. you never could underestimate stupidity.

"well, i suppose it's just for shits and giggles," artie replied, her voice icy artificially sweet. "oh, and i know of course that you're not my cupcake. you're just a cupcake." she stood up abruptly, nonchalantly tossing her bottle to the ground to join its former contents, which were now seeping into the soil. "i'm hungry. are you hungry?" she asked, a hostile edge still rooted in her voice. but any company was better than no company, eh?

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STATUS finished.
TAGGED seriah. :]
WHEN & WHERE december '07, carnival.
THREADS on the left.
CREDITS lyrics: matt & kim. formatting: me.
NOTES wooo.

[/font]

[Seriah Worthington]

`SERA FAYE`` `VALKYRIE``
`CALIFORNIA``

she'll be the secret you can keep !
--va carnival--evening--

---Had Seriah always been as unpleasant as people defined her now? Well, not really, but then again she couldn’t exactly remember a time when anything in her life was considered pleasant up until very recently. She’s been a happy, bubbly little girl at one point, but that was over a decade ago. Now she had been enveloped into the icy gem she was today. After going through hell, back again, and repeating the process, there wasn’t much sunshine and rainbows left in the girl’s personality. All the bliss and delightful hours of her life were long passed her; about eleven years long passed her. Maybe there were better days to come, but being a negative masochist, she didn’t expect much more happiness to come out of her life. The best she expected was to just live without anymore pain, anymore fear. As long as she was free do be who she wanted, go where she wanted to go, and live without some sort of hardship stabbing at her, well she didn’t care for much else. Money was never something she longed for, neither was true love or a nice car. She wasn’t much into material objects because they weren’t going to bring her happiness. Love was something she didn’t believe in or plan on experiencing throughout the course of her life for multiple reasons. Partially because she figured nobody wanted a broken, bruised, and scarred girl who’d already experienced more than any sane, or insane for that matter, seventeen year old should. She was also pretty convinced she would just be annoyed to the extreme with somebody who she had to talk to every damn day and listen to them complain about dinner and all the trivial things of the world they thought were their worst problems, when in fact some people in the world when through a whole lot worse of events. Basically, Seriah always felt alone, from after her mom died, even to now when she’d gotten in touch with a new, loving family. Nobody really understood her; nobody really knew what she went through in her past. And it sure as hell wasn’t something she talked about, not to anybody. The only reason Jess, Harry, or Teddy knew anything about it was because of the doctors and the police. She really never told them anything, not a single thing. In the beginning they asked her to talk, or asked if she wanted to, but she never did. Teddy left her alone about it. She figured that he really didn’t want to know, and frankly, if she were in his position, she wouldn’t want to know either. When you’ve lived so happily, why would you want to have nightmares about something that you never even had to go through? Sera didn’t care that he was uninterested, if that was indeed what the reasoning behind it was. Even if he had asked she wouldn’t want to tell him. He knew the basics, and that was enough. There was no need to make somebody feel even worse for you. If the situations were reversed, Seriah probably wouldn’t question him, she would just try to make things better, to make him happier. Teddy did that for her, and so she was grateful for that and the way he handled it.

---Where on earth was Seriah going in the future? Looking around at these carnies was almost inspiring, though she did not approve at all of their scamming ways. But they did make children happy, she had to give them that much. The lights, the atmosphere, the games, the junk food, this is what kids loved. Had her childhood not been fucked up to the max, she probably would have adored these carnivals as well. It helped her realize that in the long run, she wanted to do something to make kids happy, or help them. Even helping adults, but her soft spot was for the kids, really. She wasn’t sure exactly what she wanted to do in that field. Most likely not a teacher, but something meaningful, something that could help people out. Maybe she could make life better for people who would be in her position. There were two career choices she often considered in the privacy of her mind. A police officer was one. At least she could help people, possibly bring abusers out of the dark and children into the light. That or maybe she could be a doctor, be like a safe haven to those kids who got sent there, help them. At least she’d heal people in that field of profession. Whether they were children or adults, she’d be able to heal wounds, even if they were physical and not mental. It was something she would enjoy from life, something she could get out of it with satisfaction for who she was at the end of the day. Seriah had always formerly dreamed of becoming a musical artist of some sort, involving the piano. She’d loved that instrument, cherished it more than most things in the world. In fact, it was her most loved thing in her darker days. But the music in her turned against her, made things worse, now she all but passionately despised the piano. It was like any interest in it died inside of her. She stopped playing, and even stopped listening to it all together. Even seeing the instrument brought back terrible memories. She didn’t like to think about it. It was a pity though, because the girl truly had had a gift for the piano, but her inspiration died with the rest of her heart in those days. Her heart was slowly being resurrected, but her musical aspirations remained in the graveyard of her dreams, forgotten and not even thought of.

---Seriah just gave this new girl next to her an exasperated look as she made her comment about the vodka of the world. What the hell did she mean by that? And where did it come from? The girl shrugged though and went along with it, ”Hm, well if we’re lucky maybe that vodka all over the world will go commit suicide from lack of self esteem and I’ll never have to try it again. Agreed?”

[/color] her tone was bitter and snappy. It was funny how easily she could joke about something like that, something she related to so well, something she knew practically ruined her entire life. Suicide. It was a stupid thing, a self act, something done by those who were too pathetic to stick it out. She considered her mother a failure when she fell to it so many years ago. Maybe it was because of the fact that she thought so little of it, had so much loathing for the word, that she could just make a joke about it. After all, it had always been in her nature to deflect painful feelings with a bitter hysteria that made little sense to others.

---The girl’s laugh was dry and humorless when she heard the cupcake comment. Was it supposed to be an insult? Well two could play at this metaphorical game, ”Mmm, and you’re as thick as frosting, but I’m not complaining, am I?”[/color] her voice was mockingly sincere sounding. She wasn’t sure this dame was bright, or sober enough to catch on that she meant thick as in stupid, but it didn’t really matter in the long run, did it? Suddenly this girl just stood up and pretty much asked if she was hungry. Seriah gave her an incredulous look for a second, then snorted, ”I guess cupcakes and frosting go together though, even if the combined flavors taste repulsive,” she stood up, ”Hungry. Sure,”[/color] and then a acidic smile spread across her face, ”By the way, you’re not a lesbian, are you?”[/color] And there went her stupid question for the night, ”Because usually when a girl refers to me as a food usually considered delectable and delicious, and then asks me on a date, I get a little suspicious,”[/color] Seriah’s eyebrows knit together as she waited for a response. She really wasn’t in the mood to get into all out verbal combat with this stranger. In a way, it was the only way Sera knew how to socialize, rude commentary and provoking questions. How this Artie girl took it would apparently be the deciding outcome of the night.
[/blockquote][/blockquote]

TAGGED;; artie!
STATUS;;complete!
WORDS;; 1,399
NOTES;; ---
OUTFIT;; aqui!
MUSE MUSIC;; ---
LYRICS;; ocean and atlantic – mayday parade