yes im selfish, im unkind

[Santino Morrison-Novak]

SANTINO A. MORRISON-NOVAK
PIER, OCTOBER 2007

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-----S

[/color]onny lived a monotonous life. Wake up, go to work, come home, go to sleep. Wake up, go to work, come home, go to sleep. Routine was something that he enjoyed, because there was very little that could go wrong with it. Keeping himself in a box was the safe route to go, especially considering what he knew he could probably be if he just let himself go. The silver chain bracelet on his left wrist was a reminder of that. The tattoo down the side of his right hand was a reminder of that. This guy he was seeing, who for some reason had not managed to get boring enough for Sonny to finish off what he'd started.....He could have been a really nice example of what Sonny was capable of. He knew he had a problem and he didn't care, and that was a bigger problem. One more dead body every now and then wasn't going to upset the balance of nature...in fact humans were never meant to live this long, all of this modern medicine had them sticking around long after their welcome had worn out. Maybe that's why he liked his job so much--it held him over, and he was less likely to be caught.

-----H[/color][/size][/FONT][/color]e had originally picked him off as just another victim, just another sad bastard living the bare minimum life in Valkyrie, nobody too special, nobody that would draw unneeded attention if he died. So he'd gone about his usual routine of taking down his tag number and going right on down to the DMV to get a little bit of information. For twenty bucks, he now knew what this mans name was and where he lived. The whole bureaucratic system really was just a bunch of enablers--if you couldn't get it from a real person, you'd be able to find whatever you wanted published somewhere on the internet. He did a few more days of research, found out his name was Logan Dallas, that he worked in construction and moonlighted as a drug dealer, his address, his social security number, his date of birth, his drivers license number....if he had ever been interested in stealing someones identity, he certainly had the resources available. Well, this guy had some very interesting fight in him. Not something you would certainly expect from a down and out drug dealer making hourly wages for manual labor.

-----T[/color][/size][/FONT]he thing about Sonny was he liked to talk to his victims, There was of course the additional pleasure of having a perfectly normal conversation amidst crushing the bones in their fingers with a pair of slip joint pliers, but beyond that he liked to know what they thought they had to live for. None of it was ever important enough to warrant risking actually being ratted out by someone, but it was still nice to hear what they had to say. So while Sonny was used to hearing the begging and pleading and the tears and blah blah, this guy had offered something completely different. He hadn't said anything about what he wanted to live for, but what Sonny would be missing out on if he went ahead and killed him; the best fucking blow job of his life. There had been some banter and some more discussion, what made this man even think he was even interested? Well long story short, it ended with Sonny's dick deep in Logan's mouth while he was tied to a chair. Somehow, it was still all very unclear to Sonny, it was months later and the fucking guy was still not dead. They would get together and fuck, and sometimes Sonny would stay and sometimes he would leave. He still had his own house, his own job. Up until a month or so ago he hadn't even known Sonny' last name. They always met up at the guy's house, and no questions were asked. It was really quite simple, and Sonny liked that.

-----H[/color][/size][/FONT]e didn't have a car, so he was stuck walking, which he didn't mind at all. Sonny walked everywhere he went. It was good for the body, not sitting around on his ass all the time like the rest of the country. Not to mention driving just made him angry. So what if it was a little cold? His blood ran hot, anything above seventy and he was wearing shorts and a t-shirt, so the low 50's weren't going to make him flinch, he just threw on a trench coat and moved on. Today he'd brought along his iPod and thats what he listened to, looking extremely normal walking down the road with his hands in his pockets, headphones in his ears. No one would have taken him for a serial killer. Was that even the right term? Sometimes he went months without killing. Of course, he was a consecutive killer, but were the victims themselves really in a serial manner? Nothing connected them, and he'd spent hours pouring over all of his information making sure. He wanted so much to figure out why he did what he did, but he just couldn't see a similarity anywhere. It didn't matter, if he was ever caught, he would be convicted of six murders. Six murders, and one attempted. In all honesty, if anyone asked Sonny why he hadn't killed Logan, he wouldn't have been able to tell them. Getting top notch head had never been an excuse not to kill someone, and Sonny had never made him any promises that he wouldn't, even if it was good. Maybe this time it would happen. Maybe his luck had run out. About four hours later, Sonny was standing in the basement of an old apartment building. Logan was on the floor in a pool of blood, naked and with his hands tied to his back. Sonny wondered if he would regret his decision of killing the guy, but he knew it was time. Things were just getting too weird, and Logan was just getting far too attached. What better way to rip him out, right?

-----S[/color][/size][/FONT]o what now? Let's discuss the proper ways to dispose of a body, shall we? First, be smart from the very beginning. Pulverize all teeth, burn off fingerprints, and disfigure the face. Forcing a DNA test to establish identity (if it ever comes to that) might introduce the legal/forensic hurdle that saves your ass down the line. An unidentifiable body can, in a pinch, be dressed in thrift store clothes and dropped in a bad part of town where the police are less likely to question it. I don't recommend that disposal method, I'm just saying an easily identifiable body is an even bigger threat than the opposite. So what was he doing here now? At the pier of all places? After such a long hard day? Well, its always good to have some kind of alibi, right? Nah, he just liked it here. Believe it or not, the pier was one of his favorite spots here in this shit town known as Valkyrie, California. Not like anyone around here knew who he was, so he was hardly bothered. He was just some guy buying ice cream and eating it on one of the benches. Smiling at the people passing by. He would look at them and try to study them, their movements. Try to understand what made them behave the way they did. What made them smile and feel compassion. What made them human. Maybe if he spent enough time here surrounded by these people some of that humanity would rub on against him. But did he really want that? Did he really want to change his way of living? He had no reason to do so as of yet.

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status• finished
words • 1540
tagged • open
clothes here
notes • i realize this is all over the place and weird and possibly psychotic, but it has been a while

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[london]

, just because i'm losing

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DOESN'T MEAN I'M LOST. DOESN'T MEAN I'LL STOP. DOESN'T MEAN I'LL CROSS.
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what was success made of anyway? london thought to herself as she ordered her chaffeur to stop at the beginning of the long pier that darted out into the ocean to her left. climbing out of the vehicle, she slammed the door behind her and told her driver to come back in a couple of hours; she needed some alone time for a while. she was still dressed in her attire for the party she was supposed to be attending later that evening - some inane get together for people of status in valkyrie and some from los angeles - but she didn't plan on going right away. besides, it was the middle of the day, and she had nothing better to do than get ready for the stupid party. she fully expected it to be as lackluster as the other parties she'd been to, full of socialites and their drunk husbands, two things that annoyed her endlessly. some alone time was definitely required to prepare her for the evening. perhaps some alcohol too, but she didn't know where she could find that now that she'd abandoned her only ride around town.

huffing audibly, she wrapped her shawl around her shoulders and took the first step that brought her onto the broadwalk stretching out over the water. the sun glittered on the rolling waves beyond the beach, and she smiled slightly to herself at the sight. she was honestly calmed by nature even though it wasn't necessarily her first option for a hangout, and she didn't regret stopping her on her path to boredom. glancing to her right down the beach, she watched people walking in groups and couples, some all alone, and she just stood in silence for a moment, thinking to herself. when had her life changed and become what it now was? here she was, a fashion designer trying desperately to get her name into the business by attending stupid parties and socials to meet the 'people who mattered' who didn't really matter at all in the long run. of course, she loved being the center of attention, and those people were just stepping stones to her ultimate prize: fame. already relatively well known in the circles she had already formed for herself, she know had to move up to the next levels of acclaim. but sometimes the whole process just seemed... dull? pointless? meaningless? she didn't know the right word for it.

sighing to herself, she turned as a group of teenagers walking by laughed loudly among themselves and echoed past her, heading off of the pier and toward their respective homes. she watched them covertly from her place leaning on the railing of the pier until her eyes settled on the ice cream stand not far away. instantly, she smiled as a desire for something as simple as ice cream overcame her. standing, she skittered across the pier to the stand and stood patiently as a little girl ordered a cone with her mother. distantly she wondered if she would ever have her own children - as all women do at some time or the other - but she tried not to think about the concept. it only made her think about cooper and the hell she had been through after finding him fucking another man. she would picture all of the nights they had shared and how very ungay he had seemed in those times, but then she would have a stark vision of him proving the exact opposite that night when she had arrived home early from school. sometimes she regretted not cutting his dick off so he couldn't enjoy it anymore.

coming out of her dark daydreaming, she stepped to the front of the line as the little girl and mother moved away. ordering a chocolate ice cream in a sugar cone, she thanked the server and paid for the purchase before turning to head farther down the pier. since moving to valkyrie, she'd been curious about how the beach looked from the end of the pier, but this was her first time actually walking down the length of the walkway. her heels echoed louder than usual on the walkway that hovered over the sand, and she moved to the side by the rail so she wouldn't be in the way of other people walking past. she planned on taking her time, and she didn't want to get in anyone's way. besides, she didn't think her temper would allow her to be polite to someone if she was run into right now, so she figured she could avoid the nastiness altogether by removing the opportunity for such a thing to happen. as she walked, holding her shawl around her shoulders and ignoring the fabric of her knee length dress as it threatened to blow up and expose more than she wished to show off, she could feel the waves crashing roughly into the pylons holding the broadwalk out of the ocean. the sensation thrilled her, the power of it all, and she smiled before pausing halfway down the pier and leaning over to look down at the water as it slammed into the pier.

as she stood back up from the rail, her shawl caught on the rough wood and tore resolutely about four inches. growling, she examined the fabric and realized it couldn't be mended because of where it had ripped. throwing her hands irritably into the air, she shook her head. "fuck me," she muttered to herself, stamping her foot with irritation. finishing off the rest of her ice cream, she licked her fingers and examined the shawl once more, her anger and disappointment growing. the shawl wasn't necessarily an important part of her outfit, but it was useless for the rest of the night, and she had no other jackets or shawls with her to keep her warm. the realization sent a shiver down her spine as the cold breeze blew over her, raising goosebumps on her arms and exposed legs. sighing loudly, she leaned over on the pier and shook her head as she watched the water lapping against the pier's legs. she'd just have to live with it now. there was nothing she could do to fix it for several hours at the very least.

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gaby/syrus.tag
sade.music
1048.words
here.clothes
hope it doesn't suck! sorry it took so long for me to reply lol.notes
La-La-Lia.credit
meep.notes

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[Santino Morrison-Novak]

SANTINO A. MORRISON-NOVAK
PIER, OCTOBER 2007

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-----p

[/color]eople were cattle. actually, sonny often times preferred the company of animals than human beings. they smelled like rotten fruit at times. he liked to believe that he knew everything there was to know about people. more importantly, how the human body function. it was such an amazing piece of machinery. everything was connected, and each organ followed a specific function. we are supposed to be the epitome of creation. god's sixteenth chapel. and yet here they all were, wasting away in their own filth. prostitutes, drug dealers, pedophiles, rapists. if santino believed in god, he would be certain that he would be weeping. as he sat here and watched as some homeless man tripped over himself and stuck his head on the nearest trash can to vomit, he felt a form of satisfaction knowing that he was in some way performing a public service. he scanned the man's face and tried to get that image stuck in his head because sooner or later, sonny was going to find this waste of space and toss his ass in the trash where he belonged. people...normal people might call this murder. murder? really? cause these individuals have rights? even when they stuck their dicks into a ten year old boy, they had rights? they went to trial and often times they would be released over a technicality. you cant put your faith on the justice system in this country and sonny was prime example of that. was he any different? he was killing people, yes and often times he had pushed himself inside girls without their formal consent, but you cant call his victims as being innocent and keep a straight face.

-----b[/color]ut enough rant for today. he was supposed to be enjoying the nice calming sounds of the water and the taste of his ice cream, instead of concentrating on the annoying laughter of children and letting his ice cream to melt all over his hand. where has the day gone? it was then when he noticed a familiar face. how could he not recognize her red locks falling so gracefully over her ivory shoulders. although right now, she was not looking so gracefully. sonny noticed her shawl getting caught in a railing and how she fought to get it freed. a gentleman would stand up to try and help a damsel in distress, right? sonny had no hero complex and he was no gentleman, but he played one pretty damn well. it was expected for a guy to be attentive with a lady, right? and so, to much of his dismay, he tossed what was left of his vanilla ice cream on the trash and walked in her direction. as he made his way toward her, he noticed that she had so gallantly fixed the situation all on her own. i guess there was hope for humanity after all. [insert eyeroll here].He felt a powerful urge to turn around and head back to his bench and back to his thoughts, but his body kept walking forward and before he knew it, he was standing in front of her with a smile on his face. sometimes he could be such a clown.

-----i[/color]ts his false sense of being. to live in this world you are expected to follow certain social norms. you are supposed to live by a set of rules, pay your taxes, be an american citizen. you needed to have a job, surround yourself with people so others wont see you as some kind of weird sideshow freak. there were few people who knew who he was, ok... maybe not the homicidal part of him, but they were aware that he was not entire a good person. and then, there were people like london, who lived in the delusion that he was a good guy. a delusion he had created. a perfect built facade, just like clark kent did with superman. perfectly combed hair, cardigan sweaters, different color ties, big glasses, fat smile. sometimes he would get sucked in the lie and wonder where santino ended and syrus began. oh yeah, that was the name he gave his imaginary friend as a kid, and it somehow got stuck with him through the years. dont be stupid, he didnt go around calling himself a different name. to the rest of the world, he was always santino, valkyrie academy counselor, protective older brother. but for him, he was syrus... torturer, killer, disposer of human waste. to be completely honest he had stopped feeling like sonny a long time ago. the guy was cowardly, weak, pathetic, and with a desperate need for acceptance. those are the type of people who get walked on. but thats why he was around, right? it was all self preservation. confused? well, this isnt psych 101

-----t[/color]he day was nice, at least he had to admit to that. it was getting cooler, and a small breeze was now brushing against his cheeks as he stood there awkwardly with his hands in his pocket. he was never good with girls. sonny was never good with girls. he would often times stutter and find himself saying something incredibly stupid. to tell you the truth, he was not good at the get to know you chi chat. thankfully for him, london was an old friend of sorts. they met as kids, back when their parents were somewhat friends themselves. it was some gala event back in los angeles and the two of them had sneaked out of the party and took the elevator up to the roof. sonny scared her by standing right on the edge of the 50 story building and asking her whether or not she thought he could fly. they were eventually found by security because her parents were looking for her. not sonny's, they were not even aware of his disappearance. "hope that wasnt expensive". it was the only thing that he could up with? lame. he then cleared his throat and opened his mouth again "havent seen you in a while. how is life treating you?". wow, normal people are so boring

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status• unfinished
words • 1307
tagged • open
clothes here
notes •its taking forever ik, and im sorry. buuuut, i fixed the first post to be more fitting for sonny.

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[london]

, just because i'm losing

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DOESN'T MEAN I'M LOST. DOESN'T MEAN I'LL STOP. DOESN'T MEAN I'LL CROSS.
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the cool ocean breeze blew over her exposed knees, chilling her once again, and she shook herself slightly to get the blood rushing through her legs. the sun was falling lower by the minute, and the darkness that settled over the ocean helped to alleviate some of her foul mood. london blamed luca and his bitch of a fiancée for ruining her weekend. usually, she would go out and party with some of the upper class or design a new dress or something entertaining, but instead she was moping about on the pier before going to some party she usually would have declined. she needed to get out, and the only invitation she'd gotten was the one she had accepted for tonight. she needed something to get her mind off of luca's lies. his actions reminded her of cooper and the other assholes in her life in the past, and it churned her stomach with anger and betrayal.

sighing to herself, london closed her eyes and shook her head. she refused to cry even though her throat closed slightly, threateningly. she wouldn't cry over someone who couldn't treat her the way she deserved. turning from the railing, she took a step and then opened her eyes, not expecting anyone to be nearby, but she sucked in an audible breath as her eyes settled on a young man standing directly in her path. stumbling with surprise, she ran right into him, grabbing his shoulders with her hands and quickly pushing away, embarrassment washing over her. straightening her hair and forgetting her ruined shawl, she checked her dress to be sure she wasn't sharing any views of herself that she didn't want. before she could apologize for running into him, she realized the male was someone she recognized, and when he spoke, his voice was so much lower and thrilling than she had expected in the wake of the luca-disaster. hope that wasn't expensive, was all he said at first, and she realized he had seen her mishap with the wrap. as she stood staring at a man who had only been a teenager when she'd first met him - a child really - she remembered him to be sonny. they had met through their parents, her bitch of a mother and his super star adoptive father, and she remembered their time together as rather enjoyable, however short it had been. of course, at the time, she'd been scared half to death by him leaning over the edge of the tall building they had climbed to the top of to escape from the party where their parents kissed ass. after asking if she thought he could fly, and her promptly freaking out and pretending to cry to get him off of the edge of the fifty-story precipice, they had shared the briefest kiss she could remember. however, at the time, with her emotions raw from her fear for him acting crazy, it had been the most thrilling kiss she'd ever had. that, she remembered very well. the security had rounded them off right after, cutting the moment short, but somehow london had remembered it to this day although it hadn't been in the forefront of her mind until this moment. perhaps that was thanks to her emotional state following her bad week.

"wow... sonny? i figured you'd be off travelling the world somewhere by now or something!" london exclaimed, offering him a smile and hoping to cover up her fish-eyed staring from a moment earlier. "it has been quite a while." acting out of the partial need to be close to someone and the relief of seeing someone who had known her even longer than luca, she stepped forward and closed the gap between them again, hugging him briefly before releasing him and stepping away. her bad mood was certainly evaporating rapidly now that she no longer had to think about the things she had been trying to block from her mind since they happened. sonny asked her how life had been treating her, and she had to look away from him, pushing away those tears that threatened to come back again. life had turned her into what most people called her - a bitch - but there was a part of her, deep on the inside, that was still the teenage girl trying to live through being raped, getting pregnant, and losing the child. part of her was very broken and needed to be loved while the other part of her wanted to leave all feeling behind and just move on, alone. composing herself, she forced herself to smile, something she'd gotten good at in the spotlight of celebrity following the initial success of her fashion line.

"life has treated me just as good as everyone else, i'd imagine," she responded noncommittally, not giving away anymore than necessary. she was sure sonny didn't want to hear the entire, pathetic litany of her current troubles, and she didn't necessarily want to repeat them. "what brings you to valkyrie? i just moved here to get my fashion line off the ground without having to live in the hustle and bustle of los angeles where i could run into you-know-who." 'you-know-who' was what she had playfully begun to call her mother, a reference she briefly wondered if he remembered from their youth. although they'd only had that one night to talk a whole lot, they'd written each other emails for a while after that, and london had confided in him more than most men in her life. of course, she'd never told him about the most precious secrets in her life, the rape when she was in high school and the fact that she'd gotten pregnant from it. she was sure the secret would be harder for her to keep if the child had lived, but it still ate away at her anyway.

looking past sonny's shoulder, she caught sight of the same mother and child who had purchased ice cream in front of her at the head of the pier and that same burning sense of something missing flamed in her chest, but she ignored it and offered sonny a small smile. "were you on your way somewhere or would you like to take a walk with an old friend?"

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sonny.tag
sade.music
1048.words
here.clothes
awww, it's fine! i think the two of them are going to be adorable. xD.notes
La-La-Lia.credit

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[Santino Morrison-Novak]

SANTINO A. MORRISON-NOVAK
PIER, OCTOBER 2007

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-----f

[/color]riendship is not a word that should be thrown away so lightly. people were so desperate to trust each other, to have someone to confide their deepest and darkest secrets to that they didnt really stop to think if that person they chose to trust is actually showing its true colors. no one in the world is being 100 per cent themselves. or at least in sonny's mind, thats how the world worked. people needed to repress some part of themselves in order to fit in to some kind of mold that was socially acceptable for others. there were ones that could easily blend into any situation and any social group imaginable. oh, how sonny envied those individuals. to be able to mask yourself in so many different ways and be able to cheat so many people in the process. you could say that sonny had some kind of ability to do this, but he was not a master at disguising himself that way. not yet at least. yes, he was able to slither himself through school, and into the lives of certain individuals such as his family and the few so called friends he had made through the years. it amazed him just how easy it was for certain people to open up to him. specially women. one kind word, a compliment, a soft brush of his fingers against their skin and they were puddy in his hands. they would confess anything. and if that didnt work, well...he had other extreme measures. and i think we are all very well aware of what those measures are, right? i mean, there is nothing a person wont admit to or talk about when you are sitting across from them and removing their fingernails with a pair of pliers.

-----n[/color]o matter how much a human being tried to be strong and willful, everyone had a breaking point. and sonny saw it as a game to find out what that was. at the end, the point is to convince them that they still have hope. that there is a chance that they still could make out of whatever hole he had them in alive and kicking (maybe not entirely kicking, specially if he had a hammer with him and was swinging it closely to their legs). you get the picture, right? make them think they can survive this. once they come to terms with their terrible faith and realize that no matter what happened, this man was going to kill them, they decide to shut up and take whatever it is sonny wanted to hear from them to their graves. just to piss him off. which actually did piss him off and then they only procrastinate their own death and they make their suffering last more than necessary. in the end, sonny always got what he wanted. which was to play the game and to clam his hunger and desire to inflict pain in others. that was all that mattered. thinking about that, he shrugged. not really focusing on the beautiful red head that stood in front of him. he did that some times, just loose himself in thought. "i spent sometime going across country, yes. but ive been back for over a year now. i even got myself a job at the school. i am surprised to see you here though. i always thought you were going to remain in los angeles and become famous[/color]

-----s[/color]peaking of friendships, here was london. not that these two were considered to have been the best of friends growing up, but she was one of the very few people he can say that he tolerated and that he enjoyed having conversations about. every time he talked to someone, he had to pretend to be interested in whatever they had to say long enough to get what he wanted. eric was another human being who was fun and interesting enough to keep sonny entertained and worth calling a friend. maybe because he had known the guy for so long. way before he started his murdering rampage. back when he was considered "sane". just like london. she met him when he was a kid. still, mildly disturbed, but he was not a monster. he was not this fucked up inside. she was one of those lucky individuals that were spared because they had a connection with sonny's humanity. because they made an impression on his good side. yes, they would never know just how lucky they truly were. i just moved here to get my fashion line off the ground without having to live in the hustle and bustle of los angeles where i could run into you-know-who. he gave her a warm and friendly smile as she spoke. he remembered how she used to talk about starting her fashion line and how excited she would get just by thinking about it. it was always a great thing to go after your dream and manage to make it with flying colors. not a lot of people can say that. most of them just end up dead and rotting in some gutter, maybe by sonny's hand. all my family is here. well, was here until my father decided to go back to l.a. but i dont want to bore you with the details. i do want to hear more about your life though[/color]. of course, make it seem like their life and their problems are more interesting than your own gives them a false sense of security and esteem. b]you know, i was.... but it doesnt matter. i always have time to talk to a friend [/b][/color]. lets stop to vomit right now, please. still, you have to admit, that sonny could be sweet and charming when he set his mind to it. i mean, who could possibly confuse him for a psychotic serial killer

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status• finished
words • 1139
tagged • open
clothes here
notes •

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